Sit Still, Will Ya? PART I

Those are the words that God has been shouting at me lately. 

If you recall, THIS POST was written almost a year ago to the day.  So much has happened in this past year.  Our lives have been turned upside down, and inside out, during this time.  For those of you that have followed me solely on our blog, you've probably thought I've been hanging out without much to say.  It's actually been quite the opposite.  So much has happened since that post that as I've gone back to read it, it's blown me away how much life has changed.

To recap the old post in a few short words....life had crumbled.  We had lost pretty much everything we owned.  We had a job.  Lost a job.  Had money.  Lost money.  Changed denominations in the midst of it all (a whole other post all together),  and well, pretty much life got in the way of every plan we had made.  

Through it all, we remained faithful to our Creator and knew in our heart of hearts, that He indeed, had a much bigger plan.  A plan so big that our feeble minds could not dare to imagine.   

One morning, during our homeschool bible time, reading the book of Genesis to the kids, God spoke very loud and clear to me. (I have found that when I am teaching them, is when I learn the most.) He was sending us to 'The Promised Land'.  (Genesis 12:1)  The only problem was, that like Abraham, he didn't tell us where that 'Promised Land' was.   But, I knew then for sure, that we were leaving Florida.

That plan came to fruition 3 months later, at the end of December 2011, when sweet hubby was offered what he thought was his 'dream job'.   If he wanted this job, which paid exactly what we had been asking for, with all the perks thrown in, he'd have to move within 3 weeks of accepting it.  We knew the entire family couldn't make that move, so we planned for his finding a place to live and starting the new job while I remained in Florida with the 4 kids for 5-6 months.

On January 4, we drove up to Charlotte, NC (yes, 'The Promised Land') and left Daddy to start our new life, without us.  Again, this arrangement would be for only five or six months, until Amanda completed all her schooling and she'd be ready to head for college.

To say it was tough living without Daddy at home, is an understatement.  The kids were missing him terribly and so was I.  Skyping was just not all that it was chalked up to be.  Financially, we were carrying now two households in expenses and in 2 months, we were only able to see Daddy for 1 weekend.  The kids were miserable.  I was miserable and sweet hubby felt completely helpless.  We prayed and prayed and finally came to peace that God did not want our family apart.

We agreed the family would move up to North Carolina at the end of February.  That left me with lots and lots of packing (thank God for Amanda!), making arrangements for a huge interstate move and feeling stretched some days more than Elastigirl on The Incredibles.  On the other hand, I was incredbily sad and anxious about leaving Amanda behind, because she didn't want to leave Florida, and of course, my two big boys and the rest of the family, whom I knew I wouldn't be seeing often, anymore.   Amanda and I agreed that if she buckled up on school work and was able to finish, she could stay behind with her bio Dad, and it would only be a two or three months before she'd head to the east coast of Florida to get ready to start her own new life also, as a college student and adult.   To say the least, our lives were a whirlwind.

Finally, the end of February rolled around, and with help from family and Daddy who had flown down, we loaded up a very large moving truck and trailer with everything we owned and moved to a very small little town about an hour outside of Charlotte.  It was perfect!  Our new church family that sweet hubby had attended a whopping 3 times, turned out to greet us with over a dozen people to help us unload our truck, feed us, and welcome us to small town, USA.  The place we now were going to call home.  My Mom had come up with us to stay for a couple of weeks and help me unpack and settle in.  I was gearing up to restart our homeschooling and loved sitting outside in the mornings listening to birds chirp, smelling the farm lands that surround us and peering over the hills and beauty that only God could create.  I did that for a whole TWO days, before everything came crashing down....again!

On the third morning of being at our new home, the phone rang at 9 am.  The kids were just waking up and it startled me because really, no one called us.  We had just had our phone installed.  I look at the caller ID.  It was sweet hubby.  I immediately sensed something was terribly wrong.  His words were soft spoken as he said, "Honey, can you come pick me up?"   I said, "Of course.  Is everything okay?  What happened?"  He said, "I'm  not really sure, to be honest.  I was let go.  It came out of nowhere.  I haven't not had a job since I was in my early 20's."   He sounded sad and distraught.  I was confused, but mostly my heart hurt for him.

How could this be?  God had orchestrated this plan.  The move.  The job.  The small town.  The church.  Everything.  It was perfect!  "It was supposed to be perfect, Lord.  Why are you doing this?", were my thoughts, over and over, as I drove the hour to Charlotte to pick up my sweet husband.

That night, we prayed together, as we did the day after that, and the day after that.  My first thought was, "Let's not even unpack.  We could go back to Florida, live with my Mom for a month or two until we get our lives together."  But, Scott said something that clearly made sense.  He reminded me that if I believed with all my heart that God had orchestrated this move.  Then, it was no surprise to Him.  He knew Scott would be losing his job just 2 days after our moving here.  He could have had him lose the job the week prior.  Then, for sure, there would have been no move.  But, He allowed it, and He allowed it for a reason.  A reason we couldn't see.  But, we knew then, that He whatever the plan was, it was supposed to unfold here, in a small town, in North Carolina.





UPDATE:   PART II could be read HERE.

YES! THE ANSWER IS YES!

OH MY!  What a difference 10 months make!  We left the doom and gloom of the last post and are rejoicing in the goodness of God.

Excitement and joy fills the air around here as the Bombardiers prepare to embark on a rollecoaster filled ride that will forever change our lives....again.

Please keep us in your prayers! 

 

Rising from the ashes....

"In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

- I Thessalonians 5:18


::tapping on monitor screen:: Hello? Is anyone still out there that reads this?

I know it's been way too long. A few times, I've opened up to this page and have started to blog, but alas, I can't seem to find the desire to put the words together. So much has happened in the past year with our lives.

Today, I'm committed to writing. This has by no means been an easy blog post to write. It's not one of those full of happy-go-lucky-we're-doing-great kinda posts. It is full of reality. It is full of life. But most of all, it is full of HOPE!

It's something I am ashamed of. I am embarrassed to share and I am being told by the master of deceit that it is no one's business. But indeed, it is and I refuse to harbor those feelings any longer.

I'll tell you why.

Many of you know how I feel about the present administration and about the fact that this country has been going in a downward spiral since he took office in 2008. Sweet hubby's job started tightening the reins. There are now no benefits for employees, because they just can't afford it. The quality of the medical insurance (that they do not pay for) is so bad, and the cost is so outrageously expensive that we don't have medical insurance, with the exception of Kai, who desperately needs it. It's been a few months that we've been in this situation and we've decided we need to do something fast. So, after much prayer and lots and lots of thinking, we've decided to move out of state where Scott could find a job doing what he is prepared to do and where we could have insurance for the entire family.

We started looking and looking. Lo and behold, Scott applied for a position with a large international company that bought out the company he used to work for. He knew all the ins and outs of the position. Within days, we were sent an email stating that he was one of the final candidates, followed by a FedEx envelope full of forms required for new employment and blood orders for a drug screening test. Boy! God was showing himself in a big way. After many months, this was the answer to our prayers! He was going to get a nice pay increase and more importantly, we were getting great medical insurance for the entire family for what seemed like peanuts compared to the cost in Florida.

We praised and thanked Him every time the wonderful thought came into our heads, which was about a hundred times a day. The icing on the cake was that the job was in Tennessee. A placed that I've loved since I could remember and have been to many times. The last was with sweet hubby celebrating a weekend together before we picked up our Anna Grace.

Then, as many of you know, the tax credit that we'd had sitting at the IR*S for the past 4 years had been changed to a refund! Oh, yes! Life certainly was changing for our family in a huge way.

You see, last year the economy got so bad, so quickly, that we were forced to do what sadly many Americans have had to. We had to file for bankruptcy. The home that we had so proudly purchased 7 years before, was surrendered in the process. I felt ashamed that we had lost our house, our credit and were left sitting with nothing.

But, God remained faithful. He was pulling us out of the trenches. A new job was almost at our reach and we were receiving almost $40,000. that had been sitting as credit with the government. It was a new beginning for us! Yes! We were going to fix our old, now falling apart van, and use those funds to move the family to Tennessee, finally have medical insurance and start a new life.

So, that's the story of rising from the ashes. Okay, it's not.

As we waited to hear from the powers that be that sweet hubby had gotten the job and a received a starting date, days turned into weeks. Nothing. We checked in a couple of times and were told that they had to divert their attention from that position to another, but to hang in there a few more weeks and we'd have the answer. It all looked good.

We sighed, but trusted and continued to praise.

We also waited for that big check to come in. There were delays because they were doing a 'review', as most everyone I know who is waiting for their big refund, has been told. Several weeks later. We receive the letter from that infamous agency saying that everything was approved and that our check was on its way! Again, more praising. We just had to learn patience. That's it. God was teaching us patience.

In the meantime, bills continue to pile up. We are looking at another surgery for Kai in the next few weeks and praying daily that no one gets sick or injured while we wait. But, it's all good. Patience is a virtue and God was certainly showing us that.

Fast forward to last week. The email from the new job came in. The company decided to go with the other candidate because he was local. "An easier choice." We felt crushed. How could that happen? Sweet hubby had already done his background checks, drug screening, salary was agreed upon, and he knew everything about the position. It was just figuring out the logistics. Well, it wasn't meant to be. Many tears and many questions to God went up from me. So, what did we do?

WE PRAISED AND WE THANKED HIM!

Yes, it's all His perfect plan. Maybe that wasn't the job that was meant for us. Maybe it wasn't going to be 'the best', and we know God only wants the best for us. So, we dusted our sandals and decided that there was nothing we could do. We have to move forward and God will show us what door it is that he wants us to walk through.

BUT...we still that have big check coming! Yaaay! Although that's not completely the answer to prayers, we could give a big sigh of relief that at least we were able to start over. We continued to thank and praise.

We waited and waited for the check to arrive. I spent more hours on the phone with said 'agency' that I ever thought I could or would want to. Person after person assured me that it was mailed 'over a month ago'. They reviewed the address. They gave me a check number. The date it was mailed. "It must have gotten lost in the mail", we were told. Finally, we were instructed to file a form to trace the check. We did as they suggested.

Just two days ago, they found the check! Yes, it had been mailed. The only problem was that it was mailed to the trustee of the bankruptcy courts and not us. Their letter was apologetic over the 'confusion and inconvenience this may have caused.' The bottom line was that our almost $40k dollars that we were going to start life over again with was to be given back. We happened to file for bankruptcy the same year that the adoption tax refund went from a credit to a refund. Therefore, we are no longer entitled to that money.

So now, no new job. No money. No insurance. No starting over.

But the most important part of this is that we remain steadfast in our faith.

GOD REMAINS FAITHFUL!

GOD REMAINS COMPLETELY TRUSTWORTHY!

GOD REMAINS SOVEREIGN AND OMNIPOTENT!

GOD IS IN CONTROL!

I won't tell you that I received the news and jumped for joy. Oh no! I cried. A lot. I ranted. I questioned. I was devastated and angry and sad and depressed. I felt hopeless. Every single one of those feelings was the flesh. That was the humanness in me.

Then something wonderful happened. God's grace took over. I was not only picked up by a God-fearing husband who said to me, "God's plan is much bigger than that, much better. We have to trust! We have to stand firm in His word and in the fact He is in control of all of this." I knew immediately. THAT was the voice of truth speaking through him.

We again, dusted our sandals, picked ourselves up. This time, with more love and joy and hope in our hearts than we've felt in a long time, we thanked Him and praised His glorious Name! Why? Because we believe in everything He is and was and will be. He has not changed, nor will He ever change.

If you've still not realized why I am sharing such a very personal story is because there may just be a person or two out there that is going through similar situations. I just want you to know that there is ALWAYS hope. There is hope in our Savior. He will never forsake you. You just need to trust that with all of your being. I know personally, that I can't wait to share with you what bigger and better plans He has for us because I know He does.

In the meantime, we continue to thank, praise and honor the Name above all names! We trust Him more than ever now. How awesome is that? To think that life is back on track, and then you end up with nothing again. But it is really nothing? No. We ended up with the most important thing a person can have when they feel so down and so deep in the pit that they can't see the light shining over them. We ended up with HOPE! And that word encompasses all that Jesus is. It encompasses the reason He died on the cross for you and me. He is HOPE!

Come what may, bring the rain because we remain steadfast in saying,

AS FOR ME AND MY HOUSE, WE WILL SERVE THE LORD!

- Joshua 24:15

I pray these words bless you as they have blessed me.

Our circumstances in life are worldly.

Our God's love for us is eternal.

(I do want to add that during Bible study this morning, we were talking about God's promises and so forth and Kai burst out saying, "Mama, we're going to get to the Promised Land.... Tenneessee!". We learned about the Israelites a couple of weeks ago. That made me smile BIG! Yes, baby, we are gonna get to the Promised Land!!!)