DAY 3 - The day that lead to forever ours.
We were so close to the end, meaning she was signing off on her termination of parental rights and agreeing to place her child for adoption.
Scott had taken that morning off of work. We sat, mostly in silence, in our bare room, holding our sweet baby for most of the morning. Around 12:00 p.m., our attorney came into the room stating that the doctor had signed off. He had spoken to the birth mom and she was in full agreement to proceed with her termination of rights. He warned us that her heart was broken. I knew this. I knew this with everything inside me. Again, her strength left me in awe. I could not have done it. I was too selfish. He said the choice was ours of whether or not we wanted to say a final goodbye. She wanted to. We knew it was the right thing to do. He left the room.
At about 1 p.m., he came back and told us the paperwork was all signed and we were ready to leave the hospital as a forever family. But, there was that last goodbye still pending. We had gathered our belongings, dressed AJ and wrapped him snuggly in a receiving blanket and walked one last time across the hall.
She, too, was dressed and ready to begin a new life. This time, without a child, to carry. Her Mom was by her side. Scott and I walked in and we immediately could tell by the swollen eyes she had a lot of time crying. I said nothing, but with tears in my eyes, walked up to her and handed her the small bundle. We took a few steps back and let them have some time together, while we made small talk with the lawyer. She, once again, kissed AJ what seemed like a million times. Her Mom also carried him, but you could tell she did not want to get too attached. My heart ached for both of them. I had been so wrong. That was the true love of a mother I was witnessing. Through her pain, she offered her child the best life she knew how at the time. She offered him a full life. We made some small talk and then I looked her in the eyes and promised her that we would always treasure him and love him, not as if he were 'our own', because he was our own. There was no difference between this baby and our biological children. We assured her our children were just that, our children.
And to think, we could have missed this.
Fast forward 11 year years.
Happy 11th birthday, sweet boy! You are a treasure and a huge gift from above for us. We love you as much as the whole wide world, and back again.