Have you ever seen horses wearing blinders?
I've always thought that it was cruel to put blinders on these beautiful animals. I've learned now that it's not cruel at all. In fact, it protects them. Blinders are used to keep the horses on track and focused on what they are doing and what is in front of them. It prevents them from becoming scared or distracted.
About 9 or 10 months ago, I was a bit stagnant in my walk with Christ. I wanted with all my heart for God to push my faith to another level. In fact, I prayed for this. I wanted him to push me to the limits. I thought he'd do so gently. Instead, I felt like he threw me off a cliff.
God does not take lightly what we ask for, especially when He knows darn well the glory it will bring Him.
Almost eight months to the date of having been pushed over that cliff, I've learned that the only way to survive in this crazy, chaotic world we live in, is by trusting. By believing 100%, without any doubts, that when you are being obedient to what He wants from you, he will have your back. When you are still, His glory will be revealed and will shine like the sun for all to see.
reminded taught me that I am a stubborn, hard-headed, controlling, kinda girl that sometimes needs to go through the fire to be able to say, "I am lost. I can't get out of this mess without you. I surrender."
He's taught me that those blinders that I thought were so cruel to have someone place on you, were instead a blessing, a way of learning that if I follow Him, I will be on the right path.
He's taught me that only after I stopped fighting Him and surrendered completely, is when He was able to put those blinders on me. It was then that I allowed him to block my peripheral vision (the worldly views). I learned that the only way I could follow and remain focused, keeping my eyes on Him, was when I had those blinders on. I had to turn my back on opinions and thoughts, even from those closest to me, in order to know for a fact that I was following His will and not my heart or my head.
He taught me that even with blinders on, things would still cross my path that would entice me to want to pull them off; things that made me fear the possibility of whether or not I might be blindsided by something.
I had many moments of wanting to rip them off and be a part of "the world." It would have been so much easier that way. I thank Him daily for His gentle reminder that it was He who put them on. It was He who knew that I couldn't make it past all this without being fully focused on where I needed to be, fully focused on Him. It was He that showed me that the only possible way I could be obedient to His will was by wearing these blinders.
He has created many miracles these past 8 months. I look back on them now and say, "Only God could have done that."
He has transformed lives.
He has torn apart relationships and built them new, in Him.
He has revealed depths of emotions in myself, and in those around me that I love, that would never have been revealed had He not allowed this ordeal to happen.
He has shown me to pray.
He has shown me to trust.
He has shown me that only He has the right to judge others.
He has shown me to believe. To believe in His faithfulness and to believe in His Word. To believe in the power of the blood that was shed at Calvary. To not doubt for one second that He has been with us every, single step of the way.
On June 21st, almost 8 months to the day that this all began, it will all be finished. I refuse to accept anything other than the fact that my God, the King of Kings, will be there in full glory to reveal his sovereignty before all involved. I also refuse to believe that anything but His perfect will will be the end result.
I thank Him. I thank Him for throwing me off that cliff. I thank Him for answering prayers. I thank Him for not answering prayers. I thank Him for the ordeal. I thank Him for allowing me to grow in Him.
When this is over, I will be praying for a way to share the full, non-encrypted story without intruding in our privacy, so that you too can be in awe of what a mighty God we serve!
I have pondered again and again about whether or not to go private with my blog, and He has once again affirmed to me that as long as there may be the slightest of possibilities that I can use my teeny piece of cyberspace to further His Kingdom, then it should remain public.
So for now, June 21st, is the magic date. Until then friends, I humbly ask that you continue to lift us up.
By the way, it feels incredibly good to be back!